The Devil You Know
by Desktop Warrior
Summary: Is someone really evil when they make you question everything you believe in? For Shima, the Illuminati let him be who he truly is. T for swearing.


**A/N:** Like my previous entry for the RLt's Green Room, this story has seen very little in the way of editing. Please keep this in mind as you read it.

Submitted for the **Humanize an Antagonist** Challenge, part of the RLt's Green Room event. Details for this challenge may be found at The Reviews Lounge, Too forum, under the thread Fall Event: The RLt Green Room. Initially, I wanted Lucifer to be the main character, but Shima kinda stole the spotlight (bad joke).

* * *

You don't forget your first meeting with the boss.

I know I didn't. It was probably the most terrifying and illuminating experience I've ever had. Guess that's why he leads the 'Illuminati' (ha-ha-ha). I've learned more from him than I have from anyone else.

I couldn't have made a worse first impression. When they brought me to see him, I was still blindfolded, a wad of cloth stuck in my mouth to prevent me from screaming. I'd sure as hell tried, though. The coppery tang of blood was all I could taste after I'd torn the inside of my lips trying to bite off the gag. I only got a kick from steel-toed boots for my efforts. Didn't want me finding my way back here and offing the boss, they said.

As if I'd do that to the man who saved my life.

His sheer presence was palpable. Even as a human, it overwhelmed me, and the carpet cushioned my kneecaps at they hit the ground. When they took off the blindfold (_she_ did, actually; she's still my supervisor), I saw that I'd been right in guessing that we'd been taken inside a huge room. More of a hall, really, like in those cathedrals and castles that they show on documentaries about Europe. The pillars that held it up and culminated in vaulted arches seemed to vanish into the ceiling. The place was brightly lit, to the point where I didn't envy their electricity bill.

"Bow your head to the boss, dipshit." A sharp blow to my neck got me to stop staring around. Instead, I focused on the carpet, a thickly woven strip of white that led up to a dais, from what I could see from this angle. I spat out a gob of bloody saliva, tears quickly following. Shame about that. They'd have to get the cleaners in.

"What uncivilized behaviour is this?"

We both froze in place when he spoke, blood still trickling down my chin. His voice was…I think they call it 'mellifluous.' Or is it 'euphonic'? In any case, his words resonated in your head, like he was talking to you in more than just the existence we know of.

He rose from the throne atop the dais and walked over to us. My captor was still pretty stunned, so she didn't stop me while I got a good look at him. Tall, older, white hair carefully pulled back, a suit that probably cost several times what Myou Dha had made in its entire existence. Western features. In other words, unremarkable, had it not been, again, for his presence.

I'm not just talking about the slit demon eyes, which were crazy enough by themselves. No, he commanded more than curiosity. He commanded respect, fear, reverence. And you were going to give it to him as naturally as you'd breathe, or he'd erase you as an afterthought.

"My lord Lucifer…"

I barely heard her whisper, transfixed by the man's will. It was then, as I paid careful attention to how he moved, that I noticed something very odd. Though he moved with inhuman grace, it didn't seem natural on him. It was wrong, somehow, like he wasn't comfortable in this body. As he got closer, the initial awe that had left me unable to move lifted. Was it because of the liver spots that slowly came into focus? The polite cough that punctuated his movements? The ever-so-slight drag of his right leg?

When he was close enough for me to smell the undertone of decay on his breath, he paused. No, I didn't emit a loud rodent squeak as a tail – a fucking _tail_, man! – whipped out of his lower back. He inclined his head and made a dismissive gesture with his arm, clearly practiced but no less artful.

"We do not approve of your methods," he said as the hands grasping me tensed. "You have used excessive force in escorting young Shima-san to us. We should have you return to the Kyoto facility posthaste, at the risk of suffering our displeasure."

"But…but, my lord!"

All it took was a minute curl of his lips to send her running out of the hall after a firm _yes._ His eyes rested on me, and I dared to look into them. _Oh, hell._

He smiled, the skin under his eyes crinkling merrily, and in that instant, he changed. He was less a demon now (because really, that's what he was) than a kindly old grandfather, someone who commanded enough respect to get everyone to listen, even if no one liked what was being said.

"My apologies, Shima-san," he said, extending a hand to me. I took it, trembling. Embarrassingly, a hiccough escaped my lips as I fought back more tears. "My associates should not have manhandled you thus."

"Who…who are you?" I croaked. Man, I just wanted to go back home. Back to Dad's put-downs and Mom's disappointment and Kin-nii's teasing and Juu-nii's talks about duty to Myou Dha and Yumi's wheedling…Gou- oh, yeah, Gou-nii vanished to who knows where after that huge fight with Dad a couple years back, and Jun embarrassed the whole family by marrying an American and living with him in L.A. My fucked-up family. My fucked-up, only family.

A glance at the door. "Come. We will speak in my quarters."

I followed him outside of the throne room and through a maze of passages. I didn't have a choice. Everywhere we went, people in teal blue uniforms cleared out of our path like we were royalty. He really was royalty, as I'd find out in a bit.

When we entered his quarters, it took me a second to get used to the glare. The guy sure loved his white: marble walls and floor, columns, couches covered in some kind of thin, shiny fabric. In fact, there was very little in the room that wasn't white, and it stood out all the more. The room itself was bathed in what looked like sunlight, coming from fixtures on the ceiling as well as the sides of the walls and floor.

"Ow," I said, shielding my eyes with a hand. Typical Shima suave, that's me. The old man flicked his hand lazily, as though dismissing a servant, and the glare subsided into a warm afternoon glow.

"My apologies," he intoned, gesturing for me to sit in a couch opposite him. "Humans do not seem to tolerate light past a certain intensity." We sat, and I couldn't help sighing in pleasant surprise. It felt like the couch had been built just for me. Not too hard, not too soft, it was too good to be true, like it was made of light. He smiled, his canines just a little too large. "You enjoy my hospitality. I am pleased. May I call you Renzou?"

"Uh…yeah, sure." What did this guy want from me? He seemed a lot nicer than the rest of these people, but that didn't tell me much. His terrifying aura hadn't diminished one bit. In fact, the light in this room only seemed to give him more energy.

He offered a handshake, and I obliged. "My name is Lucifer," he said by way of introduction. "I am the heir apparent to the throne of Gehenna, second in the hierarchy of demonkind only to Satan himself, who has sired me. Have you been informed of the Illuminati's intentions in escorting you here?"

I stopped listening after he mentioned Satan, the shock sending me into a coughing fit. More blood. More spittle. The stains vanished as soon as they appeared, but my mind was still numb.

"S…Satan?" I gripped the couch's arm tightly. "Oh, my God. Ohmygodohmygodohmygod you guys are really demons. You're really fucking _demons! _God, help me!"

"Yes, we are demons." Something in his voice told me to stay put. That I'd gain more from listening to him than by going on my prejudices and running away.

In that moment, I made the best decision of my entire life.

I stayed, and listened.

"Renzou," Lucifer said softly, and again, I imagined a grandfatherly familiarity. Would my own grandfather have shown me this kind of warmth? My grandfather…

"Satan killed my grandfather," I said, willing the righteous anger to infuse my words. I commanded years of bitterness and hatred to rise to the surface, to help me cast down my enemies. "And Take-nii! And Konekomaru's parents and so many other people all over the world!"

But the bitterness and hatred never came. My own words sounded false to my ears. Why wasn't I angry? Why didn't I want to wring this old bastard's neck for what his kind had done to me? Why, instead, was I just curious?

"Renzou," he repeated. "Do you remember your grandfather's face? Your brother's face?"

"I…" The question caught me off guard. "No," I admitted. "I don't. I've seen pictures of my family, but to tell you the truth, I couldn't pick out my dead relatives in a crowd." _Oh, man. Did I really just say that? Is that really what I think?_

Lucifer nodded slowly. "It is clear that your indignation is contrived. As is so much of what you have taken for granted, though you do not see it." His voice dropped to a raspy breath. "Look back on your life. Think about what was really your own."

I gritted my teeth, clasping my hands together to stop them from trembling. "I don't know," I said. "Look, man, I can't handle all this right now." There had to be some explanation. I couldn't just let him walk all over me, demon king or not. Taking a deep breath, I put up my next defence. "Even if I never knew the people who died in the Blue Night, they're still family." I put all the vehemence I could into my voice in a vain hope that I could get through to him. "I still have to feel _something_ for them. To honour them, don't I?"

"Do you?" Lucifer posited, raising an eyebrow. He coughed lightly, dabbing at his mouth with a handkerchief.

"Of course I do!" I retorted immediately. "I…!" Immediately, I knew it had been a feeble attempt at best. I _had_ to? Why? What tied me to these people whom I never even knew? They were family, yes, but how many people had never even known their grandparents or other relatives? And did a fair job of leading their lives?

"My lord father did indeed slay thousands that night," said Lucifer, settling back into his couch. "It is natural that, given your upbringing, you are apprehensive of us." He paused to take a deep, gravely breath, exhaling. Clearly, something had exhausted him. Or was it something worse? I didn't stop to think about it, as he continued:

"And I make no excuses for our actions. However, you will learn the truth behind the Blue Night when it becomes prudent. I pose my initial query, young Renzou. Are you aware of your purpose with the Illuminati?"

"What even is this…Rumination?" I asked.

He chuckled. It was an interesting sound, unnerving because of the energy in his voice, but kindly and understanding at the same time. "You are unaware. I see."

"Of course I am!" I grasped the couch's arms tightly and made to stand. "I-"

"Peace, child." He held up a hand. No, he would not brook interruptions. Time to shut my trap like I'd done my whole life. I sat back down.

"The Illuminati," he explained, "knows of the Myouou demon that resides within you." Say what!? I wasn't even sure the rest of the Myou Dha knew, and yet these strangers had figured it out. "The circumstances surrounding the acquisition of this intelligence do not concern you. It suffices for you to know that we require the use of your demon. Shima Renzou, the Illuminati require your services."

I stared, not really understanding. "M-me?" I pointed at myself. "Services?" That was worth a chuckle, no? "I mean, I'm handsome and a bit of a demon myself. You know, they called me the Erotic Demon in middle school-"

"Your attempts at dissimulation are unneeded in my presence, Renzou."

The whip-like precision of Lucifer's voice made me step back, the joke dead on my lips.

"I am very old," he said. Indeed, he sounded it. "I shall not belabour the point. But I find myself with little patience for humanity's emotional intrigues."

"What…what do you mean?" I gulped. Stupid, trying to bullshit my way around the Prince of fucking Hell. Maybe I should just let him control the conversation. At this point, I was more curious than scared, anyway. No one had ever talked to me like Lucifer did. Made me question so much about my life.

"Come now, Renzou." The demon king made a steeple of his hands. "Do not make this difficult for yourself."

"I can't go against the Order." I said what I'd been trained my whole life to believe, the words coming out hollow. In Lucifer's place, I'd never take me seriously. "They'll snuff me out right away."

Lucifer gave a long, dramatic sigh, flavoured by the rattle of his voice. "Why are you still recalcitrant? Do you truly believe you are destined to serve the Order? To be held in thrall to Myou Dha, which stands on desiccated memories and ghosts? On rigid ideals?" Had he practiced, he couldn't have been more convincing. There was just the right amount of weariness in his voice, his features etched just right into a heartfelt look of worry. "Do not convince yourself that the Order is better. They have brought together all of your disparate faiths, but it is still the mortar of fanaticism that binds them. You shall find even that is ephemeral."

Unconsciously, I'd brought my arms and legs close to my chest. All this openness was scaring me. I'd grown comfortable in my little ball of security. _Of lies,_ a little voice inside me reminded. Part of me wanted to listen to Lucifer. The other part reminded me that he was a demon. And demons lied. They sweet-talked you with things that sounded logical and got you on board a one-way train to hell.

Wasn't my family constantly doing the same thing, though? Reminding me of my duties and what they thought was right? 'You should live that life honouring Take-nii, who saved you.' 'Cleanse your mind of impure thoughts, and you will enter a state of _mushin_.' 'Suffer not the words of demons, who will tempt you to wickedness.'

"Humans, in their hubris, refer to those entities they cannot comprehend as 'demons,'" Lucifer intoned, a gradual crescendo in his voice. "To humanity, 'demons' are a homogeneous concept which they apply in order to reinforce their own delusions of safety. 'Human' versus 'demon.' 'Assiah' versus 'Gehenna.' 'Good' versus 'evil.' 'Us' versus 'them.' They cannot imagine a world without dichotomy, without an 'other' to which they must constantly compare themselves."

Lucifer stood, holding out his arms. He wasn't just talking to me. He wanted the whole world to know how he felt. "This is the purpose of the Illuminati!" he declared. "The founders of this organization understood the truth that we deliberately occlude because we might not feel safe in our beds at night! It is why they requested of me, the King of Light, to lead the society that they founded after they passed on. And I took on the mantle, imbued with their holy purpose. The day approaches when all will be one! When all species will live alongside one another in harmony!"

Man. He didn't dream small, did he?

I hadn't even said a word, but his speech left me exhausted. I'd just taken the full brunt of his charisma, my mind still swirling from the images he'd crafted merely with a few well-placed words. And his demon power. Can't forget his demon power.

He leaned in close, and I could see every detail on his face, all the signs of age and deterioration. "Will you be a part of our vision, Renzou?"

"I…don't know," I said thickly. Maybe it was because this whole business had finally tired me out, but I felt an unfamiliar heaviness pushing on my chest. And…more tears rolling down my cheeks. That was strange. The kicks and pushes Lucifer's underlings had given me didn't hurt very much anymore…

Was this what being sad felt like? Lonely? Isolated? I hadn't really _felt_ in so damn long. And now, it was all coming to the surface. My breath came out in hoarse, racking sobs, and I hurried to wipe the tears from my face. "It's still my home!" I said in one last attempt to convince myself. "My life! M-my family!"

Maybe my family did love me, in their own, twisted way, and my friends cared for me. To this day, I still haven't figured it out. But more than its individual members, they care about the unblemished whole. About Myou Dha, the shadow of Fukaku which hung over us all. Take-nii, the ideal. I didn't know much about our – their – new bosses, the Order of the True Cross, but they didn't sound much better. Like a Western version of Myou Dha.

They closed my mind.

Lucifer opened it.

"I'm sorry," I said, hastily composing myself. "I'm such a crybaby." Lucifer didn't show disgust or contempt, as I had expected. Instead, his features shone with compassion.

"You are sorry for honesty?" he questioned kindly.

"Huh?" I blinked.

"You will not have this opportunity often. You will have to be Shima for some time yet, so cherish those moments when you can be Renzou."

"R-right." My breathing steadied. For the first time in, well, ever, I felt at peace. I knew that the Light of this man would allow the real Renzou to shine through. He had seen too much darkness. And he would see yet more of it. But when the King of Light is your lord and master, you're never really lost to it.

So when the time came to choose, I knew how I'd respond.

"As the Illuminati," said Lucifer. "We will do questionable things. It is sad, but unavoidable. Know this, Renzou. The Order will never admit that they are the same way, and they will tempt you mercilessly. But always remember that they are blinded by their own self-righteousness, ever labouring to remain in the dark. Do you pledge to serve the Illuminati, to be the light in the darkness, the clarity in the discord? Do you pledge to give your life if needed so that we can forge unity from diversity?"

I bent down on one knee, bowing my head. "I do," I said firmly.

An electric tingle passed through my body as a ray of pure light touched my shoulder, then the other one. When it vanished, Lucifer said. "Rise, Shima Renzou. You have been knighted with the Sword of Light, and number among those who See."

I got back up, and the King of Light smiled at me. Waving a hand, he willed a screen to appear in a section of the wall. An image solidified on the panel, a vague shadow resolving into a young woman close to my age.

"Kamiki Izumo. As a student of True Cross Academy, you will be in position to monitor her…"


End file.
